Archives for June 5th, 2007

Move over Congress of Vienna: this Saturday Ljubljana is hosting the first official gathering of bloggers in Slovenia. There are a number of workshops planned; there will also be a ton of lectures, ranging from subjects like “Blog ethics,” “Blogs in the political sphere,” “Blogs as a medium” and a lecture by me entitled:

“You Know That Dude that Natalija Verboten is Currently Together With — Don’t You Think She’s Making a Huge Mistake with Him? I Mean, Seriously, I Don’t Want to Sound Like I’m Envious of His GODDAMN Happiness But Don’t You Think He’s a Perfect Candidate for a Crushing by Elephant?”

At least, that’s what I wanted my lecture to be about. The organizers rejected it — probably for no other reason than the fact that I’m a foreigner. It’s a shame because I already have 18 hours worth of usable notes scribbled in various notebooks, including a 5000-stanza epic poem. It’s set in 17th century India and it’s about this beautiful young princess who sings turbo-folk songs and is blissfully happy until the day her boyfriend is tragically crushed by a runaway elephant. The first half of the poem mostly just describes the elephant smooshing in very vivid detail. It’s kind of gross. But the second half deals with the distraught princess finding consolation and peace with a mysterious young American explorer who is searching for a cure for super AIDS in the jungle but decides to give it up so that he can build the Taj Mahal for her using only his bare, manly hands. It’s great stuff; definitely Hollywood (or Bollywood) material.

But I suppose that will have to wait for next year. This year, it will have to be something else. So, at 11:15 a.m. this Saturday in Ljubljana, right before the coffee & cookie break, I’ll be talking about the foreign media, bloggers, and their Herculean struggle for Slovenia’s image.

My first point will be to attack the foreign press like a runaway elephant for its generally sloppy and clichéd reporting on Slovenia. I will then use many curse words and will give many depressing examples (many never seen here) of how unprofessional many professional journalists really are. I will then suggest that blogs (with the notable exception of this one) are stepping into the gaping void left behind by the rampant closing of foreign bureaus. I will try to convince you that they have the potential of providing a truer image of the country. And I will try my best not to sound like too much of a dickhead while doing this.

If none of the above makes any sense to you, please come on out on Saturday and let me try again when I’m not so dog-tired. I should also mention that there’s lots of good stuff going on during the day: here’s a schedule of events. By the looks of it, some delicious people are coming. I do know that, among the speakers, Lesjak won’t make it, which is a shame. Jani Sever will be there, though, which means that everyone at the conference can count on being put on a government “watch list.”

Anyway, I’m looking forward to meeting you there!